Full Moon in Aries: Love You to the Moon and Back

Full Moon in Aries: Love You to the Moon and Back

To my Friends, You Warriors of Love, You Defenders of Light:

My stepdad, a Defender and Protector of those he loved, died last week. And as I write these words I have to be honest. I’m not sure where this lunar love note will go and how well crafted it will be.

So I ask of you your kindness and your patience in allowing me to write a personal reflection with an Aries bent under the bright spotlight of this Harvest Full Moon (September 24, 8:52 pm MST).

“What do you love about writing?” he asked.

From my stepdad’s hospital bed, this question for me would be his last before he took his final breath 36 hours later (September 17th at 5:25 am).

A man of few words even in the most talkative of times, a lump formed in my throat as I sensed how little time we had to discuss matters such as these, the cancer in its most aggressive form rapidly attacking his lungs.

I wiped away tears as I moved my body to the side of his bed.

I told him about my love of inspiring in others the desire to dream a big, beautiful life and to unlock the keys to living those dreams in learning the love language of the Moon and the archetypes found in our birth charts.

“Huh,” he replied with some satisfaction.

We chatted a minute more about how strongly I believe we can be the Heroes and the Heroines of our own Love Story based on a higher vision and a grander plan than what many of us believed we ever could.

Secretly, I was hoping he’d hear what I was saying and decide at that moment, he would commit to writing his own miraculous story where the Hero pulls through, heals the cancer and lives a long, happy life.

But some part of him and some part of me knew better.

On this Full Moon, through the big, fat tears I’m crying, I’m contemplating the pain I have about his physical absence, but I’m also thinking about my life purpose in light of the Warrior I saw in him who shaped the Warrior I see in me.

My stepdad had a hard life in many ways, but he was a Fighter–not a Fighter who used his fists or even his words. He was kinder than that.

He had regrets and hurts and secrets and dark times like many of us do but instead of hurting others in the harmful ways some Fighters do, much of the pain remained inside–but not all of it. He was a Lover too.

A Fighter and Lover as well, I learned later in life that I had to transform the pain or it would eat away at me too. I wanted to become a Warrior for Love and show others a way through a tragic childhood, a horrible breakup, an unfulfilling career, a series of heartbreaks.

To do this, I had to lay down a long time ago the weapons that harm–guilt, shame, sarcasm, dishonesty, control, isolation, unforgiveness, anger, self-deprecation, self-loathing–the list has been long.

Sometimes I become stuck in emotional quicksand and often I invoke one or more of the archetypes from the Aries clan to blow me sky high, leaving the role of the Victim far behind, free once again of the traps that make me think I can’t live my most beautiful Love Story I know I’m living to tell.

I look to see where I’m hiding out or seeking safety in old strategies rather than taking conscious action led by that higher vision.

I see now how this resilient part of me was formed in part under my stepdad’s care and loving attention.

For the first three years of our relationship, my stepdad nurtured the Athlete in me, sweetly encouraging me to reach for the seemingly impossible, ultra-secret dreams I had to compete at world-class levels in sports.

To this end, he bought me an expensive tennis racket (money which should’ve been spent on bills) and endured hours of a rude twelve-year-old ingrate who pretended to hate playing with him. He devoted hours spotting me in our unfinished basement as I ran full-speed across our wooden floors to dangerously hurl myself in the air attempting to land a backflip like I saw Olympic gymnasts do.

I thanked him a few weeks ago for the tennis racket and the gymnastic coaching, neither of these heroic, stepdad acts he remembered.

World-class Athlete. The Perfect Girl. Top Grades. Prince Charming. Happily Ever After.

A girl could dream and I did, despite many of those fantasies evaporating as they came up against my own limitations, physical and otherwise. The rules, expectations, and boundaries of others’ making also held me at bay, some designed to keep me safe and secure until I was ready to create my own.

But I never stopped dreaming, the Athlete in me taking shape in the form of the qualities I was developing–the passion, the discipline, the focus, the resilience, the commitment and the love of the Game (of Life).

I believe my last conversation with my stepdad about my writing was such a sweet gift because in him asking that question, he took me back to that place of the Innocent when I was a little girl frantically reaching for his outstretched hand as I hurled myself in the air so he made sure I would land on my feet.

And so on this Aries Full Moon, I promise to my poppa (this name I was given for him in a ceremony I did earlier this year), I will write the words in the language I love.

Thank you for loving me enough to hold the space for my dreams–even the ones I’d forgotten and the ones that were never going to come true in the way I had innocently imagined.

And I promise on this Aries Full Moon until I see you again in both our pure loving forms to remain the Fool for Love, the Player of the Game, and a Warrior of Love and of Light.

Love Jenn

Important Celestial Events

Next New Moon

October 8, 9:46 pm (Libra)

Next Full Moon

October 24, 10:45 am (Taurus)

Planets Currently Retrograde 

*Uranus in Taurus/Aries
until January 6, 2019

*Neptune in Pisces
until November 24, 2018

*Chiron in Aries/Pisces
until December 9, 2018

*Venus in Scorpio/Libra
from October 5 – November 15, 2018

What does it all mean?
SIGN UP for the Love Matters email list at the bottom of this page to receive important insights twice a month into how to work with these powerful celestial influences that affect our individual and collective psyche.

New Moon in Virgo: When the Heart Breaks, the Moon Lights up the Medicine

New Moon in Virgo: When the Heart Breaks, the Moon Lights up the Medicine

my lips could resist rushing to you, but my eyes, my eyes
can no longer hide the wondrous fact of who you really are.

The Beautiful One whom I adore
has pitched His royal tent inside of you,

so I will always lean my heart
as close to your soul
as I can. 
~Hafiz

I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to write this lunar love note for the New Moon in Virgo (September 9, 12:01 pm MST), but I heard Her call and followed Her footsteps this morning.

Last week, I flew home to be with my stepdad who’s in the hospital at a devastating time in this relationship he’s had with lung cancer for over a year now.

We were told last summer when he was diagnosed he did not have much time—a few weeks, a few months at best.

Fortunately, the treatment he did receive has allowed him to be with us for 13 more moons.

At this moment, I can’t touch with words the grief I’m feeling in seeing his struggle to breathe and his desire to live while witnessing my mom’s fierce love in making sure they wake up each morning to the adoring gaze of the other for many moons to come. 

Nor can I write at this time about the profound honor I feel witnessing the soul’s work he is doing right now.

But what I can feel and need to write to you is that this New Moon in Virgo calls us to remember we are people of great medicine.

Each word, each touch, each act of grace—we hold medicine inside that heals and transforms.

As part of our DNA, when acknowledged and invoked, these living energies of Virgo Allies such as the Goddess, the Medicine Woman, the Shaman, the Priest and Priestess are activated, giving us unique medicine, helping us make courageous choices, discovering who we are, daring us to love through the pain, to rest in truth, carrying out and carrying on our great work.

Living. Learning. Loving. Forgiving. Giving and receiving grace. Keeping our hurting, bursting hearts open at all costs, at all times.

In ritual and in ceremony, we remember to make space to rest inside, gently, powerfully touching who we really are.

We remember what it means to be walking on the holy ground of Mother Earth, carrying our medicine in our hearts but reaching inside our well-used pouches to give to our brothers and sisters the medicine they need until they realize they have their own too.

May your heart and your medicine be as full, as rich, as wide and as deep as the Mother’s Earth.

Staying present to Love at all costs,
Jenn

 

Important Celestial Events

Next New Moon
October 8, 9:46 pm (Libra)

Next Full Moon
September 24, 8:52 pm
(Harvest Moon in Aries)
October 24, 10:45 am (Taurus)

Planets Currently Retrograde 
*Uranus in Taurus/Aries
until January 6, 2019
*Neptune in Pisces
until November 24, 2018
*Pluto in Capricorn
until September 30, 2018
*Chiron in Aries/Pisces
until December 9, 2018

*Venus in Scorpio/Libra
from Oct 5 – Nov. 15, 2018

What does it all mean?
SIGN UP for the Love Matters email list at the bottom of this page to receive important insights twice a month into how to work with these powerful celestial influences that affect our individual and collective psyche.

Full Moon in Pisces: What Kind of Love is This?

Full Moon in Pisces: What Kind of Love is This?

I know the way you can get
When you have not had a drink of Love
~Hafiz

In exploring how this Full Moon in Pisces (floating in August 26th at 5:56 am MST) is asking us to love, we could talk about the Mysticthe Healer, the Visionaryor the Artist–all have a lot to say

But what my heart is asking me to write about (and maybe one day I’ll write a book about) is the sweetness we’re being offered by healing the program of Unrequited Love.

This Full Moon search far, wide and deep (if you’re willing) for those places and spaces where you’re not giving or receiving love because Full Moons are a time for completing, a time for releasing and this may be your time to complete and release the story of Unrequited Love once and for all.

The Pisces in me has a tale to tell to the Pisces in you (we hold all the zodiacal archetypes no matter what our birth chart reveals).

Specifically, I’m talking about the archetypal story of Unrequited Love.

You know this story—it’s a heartbreaker. We’ve seen it played out a million different ways. You’ve likely experienced it yourself multiple times.

You fall in love with someone who just can’t love you back or you can’t love them.

There are many reasons. You give; they take. They adore you; you run.  You live here; she lives there. He’s cross-addicted; she has intimacy issues.

The rock-bottom line: You feel you’re a fool for love, consumed with the emotional and physical absence of it in your life, convinced you’ve found and lost the “One” or convinced yourself altogether that this lifetime Big Love is not destined for you. 

Some will activate the programs of the Escapist or Addict (that Pisces knows so well), turning to ANYTHING to numb the pain—alcohol, food, sex, drugs, shopping, the Internet—ANYTHING, so you do not have to touch any of those torturous feelings that have more to do with core wounds around rejection, abandonment, guilt, shame, loss, betrayal, and separation than they do around the one who got away or never showed up at all.

Some will learn to channel the pain, activating the Troubadour who searches for solace, healing and even greater love in finding a relationship with herSelf, himSelf through a Higher Power, the Divine of their understanding. Through the archetypal story of Unrequited Love, the hands, heart and mind of the Troubadour via the Artist have channelled for the world great masterpieces by being struck then healed from the bittersweet journey of Unrequited Love.

Some will forgo the sweetness of healing of this old story and just become bitter.

I know the way you can get
When you have not had a drink of Love:

Your face hardens,
Your sweet muscles cramp.
Children become concerned
About a strange look that appears in your eyes
Which even begins to worry your own mirror
and nose.

Squirrels and birds sense your sadness
And call an important conference in a tall tree.
They decide which secret code to chant
To help your mind and soul.

Even angels fear that brand of madness
That arrays itself against the world
And throws sharp stones and spears into
The innocent
And into one’s self.

Oh I know the way you can get
If you have not been drinking Love.

You might rip apart
Every sentence your friends and teachers say,
Looking for hidden clauses.
You might weigh every word on a scale
Like a dead fish.

You might pull out a ruler to measure
From every angle in your darkness
The beautiful dimensions of a heart you once
Trusted.

I know the way you can get
If you have not had a drink from Love’s
Hands.

~Hafiz

The potential to drown in the stories we tell about Unrequited Love can become quite destructive if we’re not willing to lay down the Victim and Martyr programs associated with the shadow of Pisces (I always get hurt, I’m damaged, I always pick the wrong person, no one loves me, no one ever stays), suss out the learning and take responsibility for how we’ve shut the front door on the Healer in us who’s meant to transmute these wounds.

What if you grew uncomfortable with your uncomfortable feelings and decided to lay your stories out on the altar of Kind Truth and Unconditional Love to see how Unrequited Love has played out in your life?

If you want to engage in the archetype of Sacrifice, do sacrifice the sorrows and the secrets, the beliefs and behaviours that do not align to a more loving vision or a higher degree of self-worth in the new Love Story you wish to tell.

What if you turned on a self-illuminating light to look for the learning your soul received, where you might’ve been responsible in how you’ve carried on its destructive legacy long after a particular relationship ended and start to understand that any Great Love Story worth telling starts with the quality of love you give to yourself?

Your new story has a new vibration.

If you’re feeling and seeing the same old, same old in your life, know that the energy of the beliefs you have and the hurts you carry may be the same old, same old. The remedy:  a steady stream of self-compassion and courageous acts of love.

What you desire will call you to rise up to greet it.

The quicker you accelerate your personal awakening and higher vibration, the quicker your new Love Story will unfold.

And you may not recognize the characters and the twists in the plot as you go to new spaces and places inside and out, but a Pisces resplendent in True Love has a trust in a Higher Plan and knows that the story will be richer and the characters far more delightful than ever imagined.

Relationships are designed to be major agents of change in our soul’s evolution, but so often we don’t open ourselves up to the wonder that relationships can be—especially if we’ve been deeply hurt.

If you’ve broken the spell of Unrequited Love, this Pisces Full Moon may activate in you this desire to alleviate the suffering of others, for you will have much wisdom to share and gifts to bestow in the opportunities, healing, grace, and forgiveness you’ve received.

In all this dedication and devotion to reaching blissful transcendent states of Love, Pisces activates the Lover, the Dreamer and the Mystic within so we can help others see that they are Lovers, Dreamers and Mystics too.

May this Full Moon mark a new relationship to the brilliant new Love Story where the love you’re generously giving is abundantly and continually returned.

Celebrating my retirement
     of the Unrequited Lover (since 2015)
       & ecstatic to be celebrating yours…

Jenn

*Image credit from Shutterstock

Important Celestial Events 

Next New Moon
September 9, 12:01 pm (Virgo)

Next Full Moon
September 24, 8:52 pm (Harvest Moon in Aries)

Autumn Equinox 
September 22, 7:55 pm (Sun in Libra)
*All times are in Mountain Standard Time*

Planets Currently Retrograde (Wow!!)
*Mars in Aquarius/Capricorn until August 27, 2018
*Saturn in Capricorn until September 6, 2018
*Uranus in Taurus/Aries until January 6, 2019
*Neptune in Pisces until November 24, 2018
*Pluto in Capricorn until September 30, 2018
*Chiron in Aries/Pisces until December 9, 2018

What does it all mean?
SIGN UP for the Love Matters email list at the bottom of this page to receive important insights twice a month into how to work with these powerful celestial influences that affect our individual and collective psyche.

New Moon and Solar Eclipse in Leo: I AM that I AM

New Moon and Solar Eclipse in Leo: I AM that I AM

What’s going on in the skies these days, you ask?

Seven retrograde planets twisting and turning us inward. Three eclipses magnifying the effects.

And whether we realize it or not, all of these celestial activations have been impacting our individual and collective destiny.

Changes so profound they can never be undone.

We’ve experienced quite the mix of ingredients in this alchemical soup, haven’t we?

For some of us, it’s been a potent combination involving a wild number of shifts: massive life reviews, sudden changes in direction, intense altercations, the ending of relationships, unpredictable moves, unexpected resets, emotional outbursts, startling insights, profound guidance and amazing opportunities — each one of our experiences altering our lives as we wrote it in the stars before we came here.

You may at this point in the Divine Storm be clinging to the life-raft of this question, “What does it all mean?”

We are rising, my friends, we are rising.

Yes, we’ve felt the extreme heat this summer on every level and while some days we’re waving the white flag asking for some rest and a reprieve, our souls are eager for the lessons as we raise our vibration and our consciousness.

A new cycle of potential is ushering itself in with the New Moon and partial Solar Eclipse in fiery Leo on August 11 at 3:57 am MST, clarifying and strengthening what we came here to do and who we came here to be, reminding us to ask the question: This ‘little’ light of mine, how will I let it shine?

Well, what would Stardust do?

Be humble for you are made of earth.
Be noble for you are made of stars.

The archetypal forces of the Queen and the King in us are activating the desire and the need to express our gifts in their full illumination.

The Shadow Queen and King may seek the attention and the accolades at first, motivated by surface desires, maybe even consumed by greed and grandiosity as they stand on top of the tower, taking credit for others’ ideas, giving in order to receive, wondering how they could receive more.

But in this New World that is evolving and in this New Way we are learning, the Compassionate, Mystical Queen and King choose to serve differently, standing as models and teachers both of love, of generosity, of vision, of leadership, of grace. 

And alongside the Queen and her Kingthe archetypal forces of the Performer and Actor assist the Royal Couple to see that beyond their domain is the Universe that serves as the Stage that allows us to embody the roles we came here to play—full out, in the light and in the joy as the Creators and Stars we inherently are. 

But negative and often traumatic experiences creating a fear of being seen, rejected, judged, criticized, or hurt may be consciously or subconsciously lurking off stage in the shadows in the forms of experiences and encounters.

Still, here we are, showing up for rehearsal, transmuting our traumas layer by layer in these areas no matter how stuck or frozen, repetitive or repressed the role sometimes feels.

Leo’s ability to stimulate the imagination through the eyes and heart of the Child has the potential to activate a vision for your life so rich, so deep and so fulfilling that these fears can be melted by the warmth and energy generated by the fires of this vision.

What about love?

i will tell you, my daughter
of your worth
not your beauty
every day. (your beauty is a given. every being is
born beautiful).
knowing your worth
can save your life.
raising you on beauty alone
you will be starved.
you will be raw.
you will be weak.
an easy stomach.
always in need of someone telling you how
beautiful you are.
–emotional nutrition

~nayyirah waheed

This New Moon, Leo may call you to dance more intimately than ever before with the archetype of the Lover, making it perfectly clear which relationships—including the one you have with yourself—are being touched by the eternal flames of the Leo fire.

Breathe in and acknowledge that you, dear Friend, continue to love despite major disappointments while others continue to live the stories of their loneliness and pain through the shadow program of the Unrequited Lover who judges himself, who tears herself up in a love that’s never been found, a love that’s never been fully returned.

If you believe you cannot have something, you cannot have it. 

The most exalted expression of the Lover knows that no outer form will ever satisfy what we are here to know within.

I used to swear up and down that this radical self-love that Leo boasts about was bull shit. The songs I sang on my bedroom floor, the romances I devoured and the movies with which I obsessed as a teenager sparked this deep desire to love another human and have him love me just as passionately.

And, of course, my relationships failed no matter how much I loved them or they proclaimed to love me because I didn’t even know how to love or express my true self in their presence.

The Love-Work we undertake allows us to eventually (and thankfully) start to see glimpses of our wholeness, the beauty, the value and the divinity within. We learn to extend our hand to nourish ourselves first—mind and body, heart and soul. 

We call in the Queen and the King to set the limits and define our boundaries in learning how to navigate the land of Love, learning to love ourselves as the Divine in our unique human form before we love another.

Ask for the love and the light, the passion and the purpose, the warmth and the strength, the power of Spirit and the integrity of the Lion’s heart in any ceremony you do around this Leo Moon and Solar Eclipse.

What do you want to create for yourself and for the children of the world? What are you ready to let go of–permanently? If you are ready to hear the answers within and trust the guidance you are receiving, let the vision unfold.

The Leo energy acknowledges there are many ways to create, innovate and grow while the Love we already are is uniquely expressed and the work we came to do is done.

Loving you (and myself) from the eye of the Storm,
Jenn

 

IMAGE CREDIT (with permission): “Leo” by the magical Josephine Wall.

Important Celestial Events 

Next New Moon
September 9, 12:01 pm (Virgo)

Next Full Moon
September 24, 8:52 pm
(Harvest Moon in Aries

What does it all mean?
SIGN UP for the Love Matters email list at the bottom of this page to receive important insights twice a month into how to work with these powerful celestial influences that affect our individual and collective psyche.

This Aquarius Moon, That Lunar Eclipse, Your Love—It All Matters

This Aquarius Moon, That Lunar Eclipse, Your Love—It All Matters

There are times on our path when we’ve outgrown the way we’ve been living—beliefs, stories, debt, sickness, jobs, partners, places, friends.

At times, we kindly receive glimpses of the new timeline.

For some of us, a crash, a crisis, a lightning bolt revelation shows us it’s time to let go…and hang on… because a new path is unfolding–a greener pasture, some bluer skies, a new set of friends, a soulmate reunion, a great big burst of creative inspiration, a career-defining opportunity, a deeper connection with the Divine.

But how do we cross over to the new space
we feel in our hearts to be truer than what we’re living now?

May I introduce you to the Full Moon in Aquarius (I’m sure you’ve all been feeling Her) lighting up our lives on July 27 at 2:20 MST accompanied by an intensely illuminating partner—a Total Lunar Eclipse—the longest one we’ve had in a long time.

Both will masterfully go straight to the heart of any matter that has been buried (unknowingly or deliberately) and break open streams of light that will raise our individual and planetary consciousness.

We may feel massively uncomfortable at times and for a while.

This break and this light will create some sacred medicine and some profound transformation, however. And while a Full Moon may affect us for a few days before and after, an Eclipse’s deep waves of change will ebb and flow for several months.

Moving through Aquarius, the Moon and this Eclipse have some keys to where their Helping Hand will be offered.

If we choose, we can reach out our own hand to receive their support.

And we might want to.

Aquarius energy moves fast—it’s the Creative Genius, the Electron, the Free Radical of Love.

We may be struck by big ideas and huge inspiration; feel the need to shake things up and call things off; pull people close one moment and push them away the next; break out on our own or be pushed out the door; believe I’ve got this and then see how quickly life spins out of our control—all Aquarian themes.

As an air sign, Aquarius focuses on ideas, inspiration, transformation and movement, rather than big displays of emotion (after all the Scientist, the Rebel and the Revolutionary have big work to do).

However, the Full Moon and the Lunar Eclipse will penetrate and push you to feel what you need to so the old that no longer serves forever rests in peace.

No one’s personal Aquarius Revolution will go well if it is solely based on logic or a plan borne from fear, arrogance, greed, selfishness, aggression or control.

Instead, we’ll be called to access our Higher Mind and the Wisdom Heart, so we can learn how to navigate the changes we know we’re being summoned within to make.

Aquarius in its higher expression seeks to create from a higher octave of love, in integrity, in heart-centered wisdom, in creative freedom, in joyful service.

The Aquarian call is a Revolution of Love that has us shining bright individually in a way that’s present to and serves what the collective needs right now.

We might ask of our communities, our oceans, our forests, our skies,
our global family, the Universe, or the God of our understanding,
WHAT DO YOU NEED NOW?

We’re asking, we’re listening and we’re committed to action.

More love? I agree. Compassionate, wise leadership? Let my inner wisdom and compassion shine. Deeper support for children? Let’s do that. A stronger, courageous voice? I’m learning to sing at the top of my lungs. More pauses, more silence? On it. More prayer? Already on my knees.

When we embody the Aquarian spirit, mindset and action of the Friend and the Humanitarian, we’ll do what needs to be done to rise above any selfish desires that do not nourish our soul or the soul of the world.

Growth over complacency and comfort. Expansion over a restrictive status quo.

How are you not in your freedom right now, my friend?
What’s the Inner Revolution needing to take place? 

In the quietest, deepest of ways, call on the wisdom, the messages and the inner activations (in the form of ideas, qualities such as courage, wisdom, inspiration, a download of higher energies) that the Aquarian Full Moon and the total Lunar Eclipse have for you.

And while we seek the true call of Freedom to clean things up, we need a hand—and some humility. We’re not going to do this alone.

To this end, seek out your tribe, your friends, well-intentioned groups and collectives as well as mentors on this plane and beyond if you need support.

If you feel alone, as an Aquarian Moon can sometimes highlight, continue to love yourself and delight in your unique gifts, knowing that you will find your way and the people who will love and delight in your gifts too.

We are not meant to live this life alone.

There was once a woman who believed that she was not loved. And as she went through her experience, her choices manifested to prove that that was true. And one day, when she realized that all of her life had been without form in love and that there had been no love, she chose, for a moment, to see herself as the God she knew was there somewhere might see her. And the reflection that came to her was one so beautiful that she realized once and for all that the only one who was not loving her was her. And she became free in that moment to embody as love. ~Paul Selig

Call on the tools and the mindset of the Revolutionary, the Humanitarian, the Alchemist, the Creative Genius, and the Free Radical to change what needs to be changed once and for all so that you can end needless suffering and show others, “Yes, if I can do it, you can too.”

And in learning how to identify and respond to our own needs, we are reminded to give others the same room to grow, for they have lessons to learn, things they must break free of and their lives to create anew—just like you. If you squeeze too tight, cling too hard, and worry too much, you’ve stepped into a shadow expression of Aquarian energy where your way is the only way. 

“There are a hundred ways to kneel and kiss the ground.” (Rumi)

We’re in a great, intense, painful, beautiful time of Awakening in an Ocean of Rebirth and instead of drowning in the confusion and the chaos of our mind and our emotions, we find strength in knowing that we all chose to be here as the Free Radicals of Beauty, the Keepers of the Light, the Eccentrics for Change and the Revolutionaries for Love.

My hand in your hand,
Jenn