When I was 15, my stepfather noticed a rather large lump
The physical symptoms alleviated, it wasn’t until twenty years later that the little pill stopped doing its job and began to malfunction. With no explanation or solution from the specialist, I had to look for other reasons that my thyroid was trying to raise the white flag once again.
The seven primary chakras connect to specific hormones, nerves and emotions and when we experience chronic stress over unresolved issues around past relationships and experiences, physical conditions can manifest in the areas related to the physical and energetic areas a particular chakra governs. When I read Myss’s description that the fifth chakra, situated in the throat area, relates to issues around communication (expressing and listening) and may result in thyroid dysfunction, I knew that my thyroid was telling me—just as it did when I was 15—the need to express my truth.
You see, by the time I was 15, I had become the keeper of many secrets in my family and instead of sharing them with anyone, I had consciously decided in Grade Six, I would be the smart girl, the good girl, the nice girl who would love and be loved on a big scale. I wouldn’t be the one who rocked any boat no matter how high the waves were because that’s not what the perfect girl does. However, at 15, my thyroid refused to go along for the ride any longer. Now 20 years later, it was no small coincidence that my thyroid once again had started sending flares off the bow, at a time I was reluctant to leave a long-term relationship and a
But I had to deal with the issue of truth-telling. Being someone people confided in from a very young age, I just assumed the role of a secret keeper. I would eventually embrace what a gift it was to give someone the space to reveal a confidence and not worry about being judged, but I rarely gave myself that same permission, however, and the damaging effects of not sharing as often and as deeply as my soul wanted silently simmered in my body. Failing to express myself or even clearing the psychological and emotional debris of experience after experience left an energetic imprint that at 15 years of age magnified to such a degree my thyroid could not function anymore. At 35, it was happening again with what little thyroid that was left.
And while I did address that relationship by eventually leaving it, I did find a more authentic way to serve in my career, and I did regulate my thyroid, moving through the
Last year, I was given the opportunity to deep dive into just where I was in regards to courageous self-expression when I was forced to respond to some claims that, in essence, were around my commitment to truth. Gratefully, at the time these claims were alleged, I was attending a weekend retreat that gave me the space to see that in some key areas in my own lover evolution, I was still keeping secrets, still not expressing my needs, still refusing to voice and stand for my truth. And I saw how each decision to speak or not speak came down to fear—a fear of being judged, of losing relationships, of not measuring up, of being hurt and ultimately of not being loved. I found freedom being able to admit that part of me was afraid and from that place compassion swept in and a new paradigm of truth-speaking and truth-loving broke through:
As long as I tell the truth (my truth), I am going to be okay.
Perhaps you can relate. It is times like these when I am grateful for the tools and the processes I have learned to transform my personality into a higher frequency, grounding it in a much stronger current—the force and the power of truth and love.
I know my story is not unique. We have all had
What used to feel like a suffocating burden growing up as a keeper of secrets has become a blessing in the way I relationship as a teacher, a friend, a mentor, a sister, an intuitive practitioner, a daughter and a lover. I know what it is to feel the scorch of the secret and the lie, so you might imagine the gratitude I have nowadays as my preference and my reality is to be lit up by the ecstasy of talking with you about what sets your hearts afire and how you are lighting up the world with your truth in how you live and love in this lifetime.
Love Letter #8
June 1, 2016
The image was originally found at http://www.deniselinn.com/Chakra-Portal-5.html