“Diana,” Goddess of the Moon,
by the incomparable Josephine Wall (used with permission).
NEW MOON IN SAGITTARIUS
4 degrees (Beauty, One Step at a Time)
November 26, 2019
7:05 am Pacific /10:05 am Eastern
who you choose to walk and grow with is a major part of life; may they lift you up in hard times, rejuvenate you when you are tired and remind you of how powerful you truly are
Happy New Moon!!
I love this sign. Social, generous, expansive, fun–if you want to raise the energy of any gathering, invite a Sag.
But Sagittarius is also on an important mission of meaning-making in our psyches, having travelled far inwards and outwards in Her journey of Love.
The Sag in all of our Souls is looking for the Wisdom from Her experiences, seeking the Truth about Love and willing to share what She learns.
The Sun and New Moon side-by-side in Sagittarius on Nov. 26 may be asking you how comfortable are you with seeking out the Truth? With stretching yourself for Love?
The archetypes of the Pilgrim and the Philosopher, Sagittarius sparks within us a longing to travel, to see the world, to ask life’s big questions and to live the answers, to plunge ourselves in expanded states of consciousness, to immerse ourselves in a spiritual container that encourages deep musings and long, mystical talks into the night with like-minded souls.
I used to cringe when I’d hear people call their friends “brothers” or “sisters” or refer to a particular group or community as their “tribe” or “soul family.”
Until I found mine.
For five years, I had a tribe, a spiritual community I loved. My soul family in a metaphysical learning lab.
We gathered locally, took many classes and retreats together each year, travelled around the world with our teachers, travelled inner worlds together. We volunteered to serve as a team to help at classes and then to build the classes, while lifting each other up, inspiring one another to live our life mission, continually reaching for greater spiritual heights.
The Mystic and the Intellecual in me were happy. I felt nourished to be in a space with such loving women who made up most of the community. I’d been asking the Universe for a deeper type of friendshipping for years. And I received it.
Then unbelievable as it was at the time, I was forced to leave the group and my position in it as one of the team leaders — the vision I had for my life was in stark contrast to the vision and intense, erratic behaviour of one of the teachers. And so I wrote an email saying thank you for the gifts I did receive, but I had to go (a bigger story for another day–and in another way).
Within 48 hours, three of my closet friends within the community messaged me to say goodbye and good luck with my life–a few short sentences and the friendships were over.
Then two more stopped talking to me. One called through tears saying she’d been asked to choose between my friendship and the community.
I’d prepared myself for the cut-off because I’d seen it happen before to other people who’d left the spiritual organization. Naively, I’d thought somehow the bond I shared with my friends would be different. That the love we had for each other would transcend community norms and loyalty to the teachers.
But it didn’t.
Many months later, some members of the community reached out. They’d been told I was in shadow, crazy even, not to be trusted, my character flaws magnified to such an extent it would be hard to tell the truth from the lies. I was told the content of the resignation letter I’d written had been grossly misconstrued.
I mentally understood that all of this might happen and yet I was still devastated. I thought my Sister-Friends knew my heart, knew who I was and what I stood for. I believed that the sacred journey we’d experienced for so many years would have kept us Sisters and Friends for a lifetime.
I imagined we’d still talk, catch up and tell each other all the wonderful things that were going on in each other’s lives. I so deeply hoped that the love we had for each other would transcend community norms and loyalty to the teachers.
But it didn’t.
And even though my shattered heart took several months to rest, the Sagittarius part of my soul which is a Seeker and a Quester, like you, is on a journey for Truth.
You may be healing places inside of you still hurting from being forced to leave a faith organization, a spiritual community or a circle of friends.
When we lose our connections to people we love, especially the ones with whom we’ve shared a deep vision or spiritual connection, it hurts. The Victim (who is human) needs time to heal from such experiences, not spiritually or emotionally bypass the pain, before we trust again.
But eventually, if we tap into the mastery energy of the Sagittarius part of our soul, the Sagittarius curriculum will sit us down and have us examine how our awareness has been expanded through experiences like these that have challenged us to grow, to stretch, to continually ask the big questions, to have new experiences, to walk through many doors always in search of Truth.
Sagittarius teaches that there is a need for Truth about Love, a higher perspective to anything that we experience.
I cried big tears for many months. Spent many nights praying for the anger to be released. I wanted to shake my friends awake. Mostly, however, I was grateful that I could breathe. Having left, I felt I had the freedom to actually live a life according to values that were important to me and in a much kinder way.
I realized that even though we may find our tribe, our community, our friends and walk a path together for a time, not everyone will walk together each step of the Way.
Many of us who’ve experienced isolation, rejection or expulsion from a family, group or community setting (spiritual, professional or otherwise) are healing from similar experiences we’ve encountered earlier in our childhood and even over the course of lifetimes.
We’ve all made choices to walk certain paths based on what our soul learning requires, each decision resulting in a new attunement to different levels of consciousness.
If you make Love and Truth the Sherpas walking you up your mountain of consciousness, relationships that feel heavy and are no longer in alignment will require you to leave them behind whether you initiate that farewell or circumstances do.
And that is a true Sagittarius tale. Our Trail-mates become our Teachers.
We don’t stop part way up the mountaintop if we are on the True Quest. We didn’t stay in Grade One, because Mrs. Anderson wasn’t going to teach Grade Two or Becky went into another class.
We rest for a while and look for a new way to ascend and a different group with whom to travel.
Rest. Ascend. Repeat. Hopefully, at a pace with much more grace and compassion and a whole lot more joy.
Love from the road
to the mountaintop
with my Sherpas all around me,
Jenn
P.S. Have you even been asked or forced to leave a group of any kind? How did you feel? How did you heal? How are you doing now? Please share your insights in the comment section below.
YOUR NEW MOON CEREMONY
We’re here for the learning, the big questions, the walk up to the mountaintop, the plunge in an ocean of loving consciousness–one way or another, our Higher Self, our Divine Plan will call us to this place of exploration and expansion. A tarot spread sets up a container to dive as deeply into our subconscious as our consciousness is willing to go. Here’s your spread for the New Moon.
by Heart Light Digital
12 thoughts on “New Moon in Sagittarius: When Your Friends Say So Long, Which Road Do You Take?”
Dear Jenn,
Thank you for sharing your story. I am so grateful that you did. I had a similar experience leaving a spiritual community. It was so painful to see the doors being closed as I try to figure out my own path and truth. All those I thought were there to walk the path with me, AND STAND FOR LOVE, were gone. It left me confused and disoriented. How do you trust after that? The pressure is real, and I know what you have gone through.
Love your statement ” Rest. Ascend. Repeat.” I had a long rest after my experience! But I am ascending again, and lovers and truth seekers that are meant to be there will be.
Thank you for your vulnerability and for speaking out!
Thank you so much, my dear sweet friend. Your response touched me so much. I love your question, “How do you trust after that?” Because it’s such a core question in the healing of an experience like this–how do we trust others again and more importantly trust yourself? And we are doing it. YOU ARE ASCENDING AGAIN, mala mama, I love you & thank you for being my friend.
Thank you for your courage, Miss Kosh, in sharing your experience. You have done much healing. I can tell. I was in a strict faith community for many years as a child but then left the church in my 20s. I was angry for many years as I was treated as if I was a demon overnight once I left a community who said they loved me. It was conditional love. False teachings by hurting people. Verbal or emotional abuse is never acceptable for any reasons so I got out–especially from a person who claims they are a teacher of God or some other sacred teachings. Bless you and your journey of light and love messages.
Wow. Thank you, Shondra. It has been several years and there are layers to the healing. I resonate with every word you wrote.
Thank you Jenn for sharing your story and your vulnerability.
I can resonate to what you speak of in such a deep way. I’ve had similar experiences where my sensitive heart experienced heartbreak, by being ‘pushed out’ of situations that still stay with me. I continue to heal from them as they run deep within me.
One of my biggest life changing experiences was that I too was part of a spiritual community. I felt that these men and women whom I felt deeply connected with, were like my soul family. These friends helped me to grow and discover gifts that I wasn’t aware that were inside of me. I believed that the teachings I received were the only way I was going to know more about my true self (little did I know at the time that there are so many more ways/paths to my self discovery). Then a few years after I began my journey with this community, things began to change; and I no longer fit the mould, so I felt I had no choice but to walk away. When I left, I also lost most of those who I believed to be my soul family. I knew deep down that my soul needed to be free and to seek a more gentle way (vs. the boot camp way) that was true for me. After leaving, I could recognize the controlling ways and emotional abuse that I experienced (to be witnessed by many), by someone I trusted and with whom I permitted myself to be vulnerable with. It makes me aware that I’m a warrior for love, and to remind myself of the courage it took for me to move forward, even though I was afraid to step out.
After leaving this community, I came across the book ‘Initiation: A Woman’s Journey into the Heart of the Andes’, written by Elizabeth B. Jenkins. Reading this book brought me a lot of healing as it describes her journey in the quest for self fulfillment though travel, and to see the world (the archetypes of the Pilgrim and Philosopher that you mention in this Love Note) by discovering her spiritual journey. Elizabeth also describes her path of being part of a spiritual community, where she chooses to leave and where it leads to her into her current life path. It’s a powerful story of her true-life adventure.
Mary. I am left in awe of your courage and how well you articulated what obviously has been a deeply painful experience. And I thank you for your book recommendation. I will most certainly read it. Reading, counselling, energy work, meditation, forgiveness work and even watching TV shows and documentaries (Holy Hell and Wild, Wild Country) helped to identify some of what I experienced–and have helped me heal. For example, one line from the beginning of Holy Hell struck me: “We fell in love with each other first,” speaking to the deep connection of the friendships that were borne from being in her spiritual community. I love your final thoughts–yes!! We are all on a true-life adventure and what a dear woman said in another comment–sometimes those teachings (on that adventure) come in surprising and shocking ways. You are most definitely a warrior for love. xo
This is something very close to my heart and an experience that I continue to work through in my own healing process. Everything has its season. I am grateful for the time we all spent together in spiritual community and for the life lessons learned. Our teachers are our teachers and sometimes the teaching comes in unexpected ways and through uncomfortable and even painful experiences. Here is to love and truth and the continued quest with more love and compassion!
Ah Amanda. Thank you for responding. That has been the key in the forgiveness work for me (when I got to that place–healing is not linear and sometimes another layer surfaces that is filled with anger or sadness). But I do feel the gratitude for what I did learn most days, have fond memories of some of the experiences I had with the ladies in class (and outside) and knowing that our teachers and the teaching sometimes come in surprising ways. Best of all, I learned how much freedom there is in knowing we always are in choice. I chose for the quest and the learning to be kinder. Here’s to your continued quest of love and truth with greater love and compassion, my friend.
Jenn – this is a tough one as I’ve been asked to leave/left a couple of times. One personal and the other professional. The loss and grief felt profound (I still have some residual feelings about the personal). Some days, the decisions I make feel tremendously difficult–the why me syndrome. Other days the decisions feel expansive to my soul–how lucky am I?
I loved ‘Rest. Ascend. Repeat.’! I feel like this is what we are made for in order to continue to bloom. I have yet to purchase tarot cards (I still feel the pull!), but I feel the call to continue to raise awareness/consciousness and build a peaceful, healthy community.
Warmly,
Mridula.
I was thinking of you while I wrote this knowing a little bit about your past experiences. And it is exactly that–feeling conflicted/upset at times and then feeling expansive and grateful. That the soul gets to grow and learn and love in a different way more aligned to who you have become. And you can see how your journey has taken to you to this place of leadership in which you are able to stand for raising awareness and build a peaceful, healthful community from the wisdom, compassion and truth-telling you’ve accumulated along the way. Thank you for being here always.
Yes and lots of tears, fears, cleansing, forgiving, resting and getting to know me, as me. GRATEFUL!!! Thank you for your help on the journey!!
Yes, wonderful you. xo